Monday, August 27, 2007


Yet another dizzy spell hit me this morning, very unpleasant experience with the head getting super heavy, breathlessness, gradual darkening of surroundings, churning stomach. It was a good thing the train came in time and there was a place for me to sit down..
It's strange that I felt dizzy today coz I was in open air area with pretty good's nowhere near hot and stuffy.. oh well.. Since I was not feeling well, I decided to treat myself to a nice breakfast from Coffee Beans.. the toast were great, the salad is good but I can't say the same for the sausage and scrambled eggs.. Actually I realized all scrambled eggs taste funny these days.. mac is like so, coffee bean is also the same.. it taste like.. you know the membrane you get when you peel a hard boil egg? that kinda seup seup taste.. Maybe coz it's cooked in the microwave? but I just think it taste funny :p
Ah dear just praised me the other day *beams* He was telling me that he observed me for a few months and found that I've really changed in terms of my expenditure, I no longer spend money like there's no tomorrow. Though my bank account is still miserably low by the end of the month, at least I'm not spending the money on unless stuff like stickers..

I think he mentioned this coz I brought a new dress the other day and he was telling me I deserve it coz I haven been buying anything for myself in ages, which is true.. I just dun like to shop and spend so much on clothes..

It's so xin fu to be with Ah Dear.. We were discussing about job change the other day as I'm considering a move, I want something that pays more so that I can contribute more to our place, then he was telling me that as long as I am happy with my current job, I should not job hop just for the extra cash. He mentioned that we are ok in terms of finances right now and he rather that I stay with my current job and be happy then be in a high paying job and hating every moment of it.

What can I say? I heart my dear Ah Dear..
I'm suddenly reminded of the times where I fell asleep watching telly and my daddy will carry me back to the room and tuck me into bed.. What can I say? I love my daddy!! Nobody is perfect and my dad is far from it, but still I love him dearly coz .. .. he's my dad, without him I'm nothing. That's the thing about family, despite all our faults, we love each other dearly..

My gong gong is not feeling well these days.. My  ma ma said that he haven been eating for the past week and he refused to be hospitalized, which I can understand coz to many old pple, hospitalization means signing on your death certificate. Of course it's better to have medical help on hand, but to be so surrounded by death, I rather just stay home and die with my loved ones around me.

I think at the moment, all I want for my gong gong is for him to go peacefully.. It hurts to see someone you love in constant pain.. it blurs the happy memories you have of that person and.. .. . I dunno.. .. ..
Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.

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