Thursday, September 29, 2005

Scars

Everyone have some form of scars, the most common being the one on our knees that we will definitely get back in school days.. the blur blur trip and fall.. then tears then limping to the first aid room..

I have quite a couple of scars.. like the one where I fell down in the "cursed" basketball court back in primary school. I think almost all the friends that I had back in primary school had fallen down on that "cursed" basketball court some time or another.. the one that was torn down and had the new hall built over lor.. it's really cursed.. everyone knows it.. *ominous music*

The spiral scar which I got after hitting my kneecap against a humongous seashell.. my fault, coz I was jumping around :p and the lovely shell broke..

The scar on my bcg caused by stupid chicken poxs.. else my bcg left almost no scar at all.. it was nice and smooth, just abit red.. then I had chicken poxs and now that area is slightly protruding.. ugly..

There were the scars that I've gotten back in uni days.. those bumps and cuts that developed into scars coz I never let them have the chance to heal properly.. I know, it's weird, but I have this thing for blood.. as in I like to see blood flow.. I dunno why.. and sometimes I relish the pain that comes along with it.

All these sounds weird and perverted but it was what I felt then. I know now that I should never do that, coz it leaves a scar and it hurts the people who loves me.. But the pain.. pain can numb a person very effectively.. pain can be exquisite.. pain can be overwhelming.. pain.. just pain.. ..

Digressed again.. I was talking about scars.. Yesterday night, whilst I was applying lotion to my hands and legs, I realised some scars had faded quite a bit.. It's been some time since i've taken a good look at them and suddenly, they are like almost gone..

Some scars holds special meaning for me, coz of the time and location of its beginnings.. Having them fade off seems to be like a signal of some sort to me.. maybe I'm reading too much into my body's natural healing process, but their healing really does seem like a sign to me. Signal for me to leave my baggage behind; Signal for me to move on to other more important things..

Scars fades.. times gone by without mercy.. But sometimes the scar might fade, the memory will not fade..

Physical scars fade with time.. Mental scars fade with determination..

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