I'm always scared of being alone.. with no one to talk to, or no one to be with..
was watching a chinese talkshow the other day and this actress said, those who are most afraid of being alone, who cannot learn to embrace loneliness are the most lonely people in the world.. am i one of them??
I need constant attention, ask pple who really knows me and they can tell you so.. I like being alone at times, but that's really like once in a blue moon.. I like to have people around me all the time.
Maybe I dun like to be alone coz I think too much.. I tend to think about alot of things when I'm alone, things which I do not really like to think about.. things that gives me a headache/heartpain/pain in the arse when i think about them.. I tend to think about things that were never going to be.. things that can never happen and things that are long gone but I wish they weren't
Escapist?? I think so..
Recently kinda lost a good friend.. it's a long long story.. i dun even know where to start.. just felt that it was my fault that things ended on this note.. I'm too darn implusive. I dun think before I talk.. I have a terrible temper.. it's bad.. I tot I've overcome these problem, but it seems like I haven.
Maybe the lost is a good thing, it reminded me of what I need to change about myself..
And I still have my circle of good friends around me..
Thank you Xuan, Jun, Xianhe, Tian, Zhen and Ivan for always being around.. especially to my buddy Xuan and my dearest Jun.. Also thank you Yingzhi for all the company, the bubble tea :) and jay's concert.. thank you Xiaobao for all the late nite chats.. thank you Juliana and Diana for being there during work and when I was down.. thank you Robin for listening to me when I was at my lowest.. thank you Wenwei for entertaining me and letting me know the latest news about phones..
And THANK YOU to my Best Friend/Buddy/Boyfriend/Dearie/Ah Gong for always being around.. from Starhub days till now.. and for the rest of our days :) I love you dearie.. really really do..